“I remember interlinking with my Titan,” JJ said. “Not a flash of memory or a strong nostalgic feeling like most Wielders have, but every detail. Do you remember it?” 

JJ stood in the morgue – lights dim like the tunnels in which he’d proven his inadequacy as a fighter, cold settling over his skin as it did his heart – and stared at his best friend, as alive as JJ felt inside. 

After his outburst, JJ’s legs led him here. He’d demanded proof of Paul’s death. He surprised himself after he saw his friend. He figured he would have screamed, cried, clawed at his chest. Something like what he’d seen Paul do when his parents died. 

Instead, his energy vanished, like a breath in the breeze. 

“We were four,” JJ continued. “Our class was walking to the science museum and we crossed through Ardgil Park. That was the first time I saw that huge-ass tree in the center and I knew, oh I knew I had to climb it. 

“And of course, you knew, too. You did everything you could to stop me. You nagged, you constantly poked me, and you even threatened to tell my parents. Low blow, man. I thought we were friends. But I promised I wouldn’t climb the tree.” 

JJ smiled. “How clever I thought I was. There was no way you could see through my genius ruse, or notice the fingers crossed behind my back. I snuck out after bedtime and went to the park. Which – now that I say it out loud – what the hell was a four-year-old thinking sneaking around this city in the middle of the night? I was insane!” 

Paul used to smirk at those kinds of jokes. Paul had always been a fan of self-deferential humor, exclusively when aimed at JJ. 

“But I wasn’t the only one. By the time I got to the tree, you were already there! Your last stand was grand, but nothing could get between that perfectly climbable, fifty-foot-tall tree and me. 

“Oh sure, you yelled and threatened to tell my parents again, but nothing could stop me. I climbed and climbed and climbed. Probably got a good halfway up there before I looked down.” 

JJ lowered his head. “Maybe they shouldn’t keep the lights on all night. If I hadn’t seen the ground, how high up I was, maybe I wouldn’t have gotten vertigo. Maybe I wouldn’t have slipped from the branch and fallen to my soon-to-be demise. 

“And... that’s when the miracle happened. I’m not talking about the Titan coming down, swirling the winds around me and making my own personal twister. I’m not even referring to when we interlinked, merging our spirits together, allowing me to twirl the winds and catch myself. That’s not why I remember that night.” 

JJ clenched his fists, his arms shaking alongside his voice. “It was you, Paul. I deserved what was coming. But, you ran to me, right where I would’ve landed. You tried to break my fall. You could’ve died, only for the smallest chance that I wouldn’t.” 

JJ placed his forehead against the glass, his chest tightening, the backs of his eyes growing heavy. “That’s why I remember it so well. I realized, then and there, that I had just met the most loyal friend I’d ever know. In my whole life, I’d never meet a better person than you. 

“And I felt like such a fraud.” 

JJ slammed the bottom of his fists against the glass, rattling it. “It should’ve been you! This damned Titan picked the wrong kid. All my life I’ve been impatient, impertinent, and unruly. I don’t deserve such a divine gift. I...” Now JJ clutched at his chest, his heart threatening to tear from it. “I lorded it over you. When all you’ve ever been is kind and happy for me.” 

JJ’s body trembled. “What the fuck was it thinking? What was I thinking? How could I have ever thought myself better than you? I’m so stupid, Paul. I know you already know that, but I have to say it. I’m an idiot, I’m a moron, I shouldn’t have said the things that I did. Just please, sit up. Nag me again. Poke me again. Tell on me to my parents or the priests or even the cardinal himself. Just sit up!” 

But Paul lay still, ignorant of JJ’s pleas. 

JJ screamed. Tears descended his cheeks, his nostrils dribbled, and his knees gave out. JJ unfurled his fists, clawing at the clear barrier separating him from his closest – his only – friend. 

“It should be me,” JJ mumbled. “You should have this power. I should be lying cold. It’s not fair. I hate it. I hate this.” 

After several more minutes, JJ collected his breath, wiped his nose, and stood. “Thank you, Paul, for being this asshole’s friend.” 

The Flame Dancer guild-member stepped next to JJ, watching Paul with a soft expression. 

“Don’t,” JJ said. “Just don’t. I’m not in the mood.” 

“I know,” he said, his black hair covering his eyes. 

“Then leave me alone.” 

“Already did. That’s not what you need right now.” 

JJ rounded on him. The man was taller and clearly better trained, but right now nothing could intimidate JJ. 

“And how do you know what I need?” JJ roared. “The moment you get your best friend killed, come talk to me.” 

The man merely glanced at JJ. His dark eyes were like a well so deep light couldn’t reach the bottom. In that darkness, that void, grief festered. 

JJ recoiled, stepping back. His breathing returned to normal. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t assume things.” He looked back at Paul, his heart panging. “Does it get any better?” 

“That’s what they say,” the man said. “Easier, at least.” 

“What do you say?” 

“It doesn’t matter if you’re hurt. You need to live and love your life. That’s what he’d want.” 

“He’d want me to be less of an idiot.” 

“Of course. People will tell you something else, unless they’re real with you like Bishop Diego. They’ll say it wasn’t your fault. You didn’t kill him, because you didn’t pull the trigger. But we know better.” 

“It’s more than that.” JJ closed his eyes, his shame overwhelming. “You were there because of me. But... so was Serene.” 

If only the Flame Dancer responded. He could have asked JJ to explain, or even gasped. But he held his silence, eyes never leaving Paul, forcing JJ to continue on his own volition. 

“To get an interview with Serene, I lied to a thug in Howin. Told him I’d get his guy out of jail if he gave me an in. Braiden, Serene’s head, liked the idea, and Asaka and Dearil, the Ethereal Leaders, encouraged it. 

“I didn’t pull the trigger, but I set up the wheel and the wind and watched how it spun.” 

Silence yet again. The man’s face didn’t shift. 

“What do I do?” JJ pleaded. “How do I deal with the guilt?” 

“Face what you’ve done,” the Flame Dancer said. “Work to right your wrongs. Train so you never fail again. And never go back to the cocky shit who thought he couldn’t.” 

“That easy?” 

“It’ll be easier now that you’ve found your flame.” 

“I’m an Autonomous, remember? Fire is for Ardents.” 

“I’m also Autonomous, since I’m a Dracon.” 

Paul glanced at him, brow furrowed, looking for a Weaver Mark. “Why didn’t you use air in the fight?” 

“I haven’t evolved yet.” 

“That’s... that’s not how that works.” 

“Maybe it should. It’s stupid to ignore Ardent teachings because you’re Autonomous.” 

“I don’t ignore them, really. But I’m not meant to find a flame. I need wind beneath my wings, letting me soar wherever I freely choose.” 

“Then you’ll lack the passion and drive you need to better yourself. Without a purpose, or determination, you’ll slip back into what caused this mess. It takes fuel to keep a fire lit.” 

“I had passion and determination to take Serene down. That ‘flame’ burned a forest.” 

 “So you’ll never warm yourself again? Wander without a goal, only because you want to be free? What’s the point of freedom if you don’t choose to do something useful?” 

Something Deacon Mark had tried to get into his thick skull earlier today. He’d thought he was being useful. And this is where it brought him, debating religious semantics in front of his best friend’s corpse. 

JJ’s armband buzzed. Nadja was calling him. Strange. She’d shared the location of the two entrances and exits to the hideout, as well as various information regarding their firepower, while JJ rushed to the hospital. They weren’t supposed to be in constant correspondence in case someone caught her. 

JJ cleared his throat and tried to keep a level voice as he answered the call. “Hey. What’s going on?” 

“Greetings, JJ,” a smooth voice said. 

JJ’s stomach dropped, his hair standing on end. That was Asaka. 

“We were just wondering where you were, friend.” 

“I’m going for a walk,” JJ said, straining to keep his voice even. “I’ll be back shortly.” 

“Oh, please do,” Dearil said. “We would hate for you to miss the show.” 

“The what, now?” JJ asked. 

“It’s the strangest thing,” Asaka said. “Our leader’s aid was acting quite suspicious.” 

“Taking second stock of all the equipment,” Dearil said.” 

“Which in theory makes sense.” 

“We have an operation tomorrow, which is quite important for Serene’s future.” 

“But she spent a long time on her tablet.” 

“Turns out, she was sending all of this information to someone currently not within the hideout.” 

“Do you have any idea who that might be?” 

“There’s no reason to be so dramatic,” JJ said. “I wanted the information so I could contribute something in the next meeting.” 

“Then what are you doing at the hospital?” Dearil asked. 

A cold hand clenched JJ’s heart. “What are you–?” 

“Don’t insult our intelligence, JJ,” Asaka said. 

“It’s easy to hack into a civilian wristband,” Dearil said. 

“And view the latest applications employed.” 

“Map Pings, organization journals, even quite a lot of use from a recorder.” 

“All that is... circumstantial,” JJ said.” 

“We’re disappointed, JJ,” Asaka said. “We truly wanted the best for you.” 

“You threw away an incredible opportunity,” Dearil said. 

“With our teaching, you could have led Serene to a grand, bright future.” 

“We would have honed you into the best version of yourself.” 

Paul lay before him, eyes closed to never again see Talam’s wonders, mouth shut to never again laugh and share the good news, hands still to never again help the injured from the ground, or pull JJ in the right direction. 

Something sizzled in JJ’s heart. 

“Bullshit.” JJ ended the call. 

“Someone in trouble?” the Flame Dancer asked, finally looking away from Paul. 

“I need to find a Peace Keeper,” JJ said. “Give them my report and my evidence. If they hurry, maybe her body won’t lie next to Paul’s.” 

“Then why are you wasting your time with scum like him?” a deep voice said. 

A man in Peace Keeper uniform – thick material of whites and blacks interwoven among themselves – stood in the morgue’s doorway, arms like large rocks crossed, glaring death at the man next to JJ.